Are You There Yet?

Are You There Yet?

This life is a journey ….from birth to death…and what we do in between is largely a combination of the personal circumstances we birth ourselves into, the qualities that we have innately, those we learn from others or pick up somewhere else along the way and what actions (or inactions) we choose to take during our life

There may be certain points in life at which we might think we have “made it” – perhaps the perfect job, the ideal marriage and family set up, beautiful house, a comfortable retirement or whatever combination of things it is. The truth is though that we never really make it on the outside unless we have made it on the inside.

If you are able can look at life as a learning experience, then you could say that the past 16 months have offered an abundance of “lessons” to many people. Maybe the biggest one is that anything can be taken away from you at the drop of a hat, whether that’s your personal freedom, your right to hug others, your right to speak out in public, your right to travel, etc etc

That is unless you have a good and active sense of personal self-esteem – how you feel about yourself or know yourself to be – in which case nothing can ever really be taken away from you. 

Life is always a series of challenges (that’s how your Soul sets it up for you…if you’re willing to see it that way) and recent challenges have given us all the opportunity to build a sense of self-esteem from which you can cope with anything and anyone. Sadly, the alarming rise in both mental health issues and suicide rates clearly indicate that many have been unable to do that and have succumbed (through no fault of their own) to the torrent of overwhelming fear and other negativity that has been unleashed by the media.

However, the journey of life is a healing one when we can find the support or the ability within ourselves to make it so. That doesn’t mean we need to go a healer for healing (though that may help), for healing happens in a variety within the everyday circumstances of life if we recognise and allow it.

The journey of life is about knowing yourself, and accepting all of your flaws and all of your fabulousness for what they are, it is about being able to feel safe in what is currently an unsafe world – it is about trusting yourself…and you can only do that when you know yourself. It’s about being authentic.

So, are you there yet? How do you know if you are? And does it matter….so long as you are getting there?

Some of the following thoughts and observations may be useful indicators for you?
  • You are grounded and present (most or all of the time)
  • You keep your promises (your word) to yourself
  • If someone criticises you – you know this is about them (and not you)
  • You believe (or perhaps even know) that you are enough 
  • You always do your best – without striving for perfection
  • When making decisions, you reflect before asking others what they’d do
  • You are able to discern for yourself what is true and what is not
  • You start to question some of your own limiting beliefs (in a healthy way) 
  • You stop trying to control other people and other situations
  • You stop making assumptions about others & ask them questions instead
  • Other people’s opinions or actions do not make you angry anymore
  • You recognise the need for you (and others) to see both sides of a story
  • You can easily accept you might be wrong about something or someone

So, are you there yet? and does it matter if you are not, because hopefully you are at least on your way “there”, and hopefully you can support others who might be looking to get there too. The world desperately needs more people with a good sense of self-esteem.

There are many ways to build positive self-esteem – hypnosis is one that I offer (and talk about further down this newsletter) however as I’ve said earlier it doesn’t have to be a therapeutic solution – everyday life offers many opportunities to build upon your sense of feeling good about who you are.



Are you there yet is another blog post from the keyboard of Doug Buckingham – if you are interested to read more then you can do so here

To find out more about my online courses (which are on another site) please click here